Tuesday 9 February 2010

Nurture

It is a cliche, but every day is a new day, a new beginning, a re-birth.  And sometimes cliches are true: that's how they reached the pre-eminent status of cliches!

But what could 'birth' mean, if we were to be born again every morning as we awaken?  To me there is a spectrum of 'birth', ranging from complete reinvention of ourselves to gentle care, affection and nourishment. 

The most radical form or rebirth is when we totally reinvent who we are.  This happens very seldom in our lifetime, perhaps once or twice, and is usually the result of either desperation or inspiration.  It happens when we are pushed to the limits of who we thought we were and decide that this is not who we wish to be.  There is more to us than who we are in that moment.  And so a profound shift occurs, often overnight, as we begin to realign with a greater vision of who can be.

At the more subtle end of the spectrum, is what happens when we get out of bed on the wrong side.  It's not a disaster, but we are simply not living through the best of who we are.  We are grouching, snappy, sarcastic, hot-tempered...  Most of us simply tolerate these days and wait for them to end.  But what if we did something different? What if nurtured ourselves?  If we did something to care for ourselves that would nourish and uplift us?  What if we gave to ourselves as we would care for a beloved child?  If we lavished some of that care and attention onto ourselves? 

There are many ways to do that: giving ourselves permission to take 10 minutes to do some freewriting on blank sheets of paper, with the intention that, at the end of the 10 minutes, we would have poured out our frustration and have a clearer idea of the root cause.  We could do something small that pleases us, like having cup of filter coffee instead of using instant coffee.  Or we could reach out and ask for some love and support, whether it's an ear to listen, a shoulder to cry on, or arms to give us a hug (or 12!).

And then, there are great days, when the sun shines, the bees buzz and all is well with the world.  On these days we have the energy to nurture others effortlessly.  It's a cycle, as is all of life.  There are moments when we give and moments when we taken, moments when we are joyful and moments when we retreat. 

Why should nurturing be a quality that is reserved for new born babies and children?  Why is it now a quality that we live and share throughout each day, just sharing this quality with our loved ones would be make this a gentler, softer and more caring society.

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