As if on demand, the universe has just provided me with a situation to explore how my new understanding of personality and Self interact.
Dirk and I have just had a disagreement. I thought he had asked me to do ABC and I had done it with delicacy as to what was important to him. When I told him, he was annoyed with me because he wanted XYZ.
I was really hurt because I had done my best with a genuine consideration for what mattered to him. At the point where he was giving out, I realised it wasn't Him giving out to me, he was just running his programming. And at the point where I was hurt and upset, it was just my programming.
I still felt my pain, but I saw myself feeling it. It wasn't all of me. I was processing on two levels: the immediate feeling level and the observer level that noticed but didn't blame or judge either party.